As a college student, I am often faced with many wonderful opportunities and choices. There are so many organizations that whoever has the right stuff can join, internships you can apply for, and scholarships you can get. Sometimes I feel that there are so many opportunities for us students, the hardest thing is deciding which ones to try.
Of course, that's not to say that there aren't stipulations for getting these opportunities. In order to ensure that you are an ideal candidate, you can attend seminars about success, read self-help books, and try to gain experience to make you a well-rounded and healthy person.
Though we're all far from perfect, personally I try to gain a lot of substance. I've gone to the career center to learn to exploit my strengths, and I've got communication skills coupled with an ability to keep a positive atmosphere when things are tough. I know how to give an interview, with enthusiasm and professionalism. The two most important characteristics an applicant can have to an employer are honesty and leadership skills, and I both value honesty and have experience with leadership classes. Not bad for a sophomore?
However there is one vital element that I lack, an element that cannot be taught in a seminar or learned in a book. This element has barred me from probably a good three-quarters of the scholarships and internships for which I have wished to apply. No, what I (along with so many others) am lacking is much more important than a positive attitude.
What I am talking about of course is the elusive dark skin.
How could I have missed that? I guess I am just not talented enough to apply for the American Academy of Science's Minority Science Writing Internship, nor can I get the Flip Wilson Journalism Scholarship. Sure I'm a journalism major with a passion for science and an ability to write a biography for Flip Wilson, but I just don't have enough of that golden melanin to be deserving.
So I encourage you pasty-faced losers, don't let this happen to you. Don't get so caught up in things like education and experience, because a true test of character is reflected in your complexion. Sure, you might get skin cancer before you're tan enough to be considered a minority, but it's worth the risk. Besides, us white people should be ashamed of the way we were born, anyway.
Of course, that's not to say that there aren't stipulations for getting these opportunities. In order to ensure that you are an ideal candidate, you can attend seminars about success, read self-help books, and try to gain experience to make you a well-rounded and healthy person.
Though we're all far from perfect, personally I try to gain a lot of substance. I've gone to the career center to learn to exploit my strengths, and I've got communication skills coupled with an ability to keep a positive atmosphere when things are tough. I know how to give an interview, with enthusiasm and professionalism. The two most important characteristics an applicant can have to an employer are honesty and leadership skills, and I both value honesty and have experience with leadership classes. Not bad for a sophomore?
However there is one vital element that I lack, an element that cannot be taught in a seminar or learned in a book. This element has barred me from probably a good three-quarters of the scholarships and internships for which I have wished to apply. No, what I (along with so many others) am lacking is much more important than a positive attitude.
What I am talking about of course is the elusive dark skin.
How could I have missed that? I guess I am just not talented enough to apply for the American Academy of Science's Minority Science Writing Internship, nor can I get the Flip Wilson Journalism Scholarship. Sure I'm a journalism major with a passion for science and an ability to write a biography for Flip Wilson, but I just don't have enough of that golden melanin to be deserving.
So I encourage you pasty-faced losers, don't let this happen to you. Don't get so caught up in things like education and experience, because a true test of character is reflected in your complexion. Sure, you might get skin cancer before you're tan enough to be considered a minority, but it's worth the risk. Besides, us white people should be ashamed of the way we were born, anyway.
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